


Hope dies at the end

by xSadGlow



Category: Wentworth (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic, Eventual Smut, F/F, Fluff, Freakytits - Freeform, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-10
Updated: 2019-04-10
Packaged: 2020-01-06 21:24:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18396635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xSadGlow/pseuds/xSadGlow
Summary: Vera left Joan's apartment quietly, like a ghost. She's actually feel like a ghost, invisible.Only plate and glass of wine were proof of presence of woman in this sanctuary.





	Hope dies at the end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my first fantic in English. To be honest I'm a little scared, but hope you like this 🖤

Silence hung heavily in the air. Words that will never be spoken rattled in the heads of both women. Joan's hand awkwardly lay on top of Vera's hand. Flames of anger dance in Vera's big blue eyes. 

"They stab me with the fucking needle" she shout. She was furious, disappointed. Mostly disappointed by older woman who said she care and did nothing when Vera needed her. Dark-haired woman gently squeezed her delicate hand in an apologetic gesture. She had never seen Vera in such mood. In the other situation it was be delightful seeing her Deputy with that passion. But now she wasn't sure how to comfort petite woman. In fact Joan wasn't a good comforter, she never learned how deal with other people emotions. She cleared her throat, searching for the right words. 

"Did are you... Did are you infected?" she asked softly. This wasn't the most appropriate question at the moment, however, Governor had to know how much she failed her. Suddenly, Vera's eyes became empty, completely devoid of emotion, expression.

"I don't know, Joan. I still waiting for medical test results" she said quietly and sighed. 

"But you really think they lied about blood in this syringe? Because I don't think so. I have no hope" a flat, cold voice echoed through the apartment. For the all time she don't break eye contact with Joan, even if her gaze at the older woman was without expression. Inside she begging her for do something. Even simple wrapping arms around her could gave Vera some sense of safety. She needed Joan. She needed to hear from her that she is with her, and everything would be fine, and that she is not alone. She wanted Joan to prove her words that she cares. 

Vera's eyes narrowed when she noticed that older woman moving her hand away to the napkin and wiping it thoroughly. It hurt her physically. It hurt her even more that Joan's dark eyes didn't even look at her. Suddenly she felt like something disgusting. 

"I understand" she whispered, smiling sadly. Vera left Joan's apartment quietly, like a ghost. She's actually feel like a ghost, invisible.Only plate and glass of wine were proof of presence of woman in this sanctuary. 

In the car, she put her head on the steering wheel. She did not cry, even if earlier tears had escaped very quickly from her eyes. Like she leave part of herself in that dining room. She started screaming, hitting the steering wheel with her fists. Her heart was broken. In the presence of an older woman, she always felt better. She felt valuable, good enough. In the presence of an older woman, she always felt better. She felt valuable, good enough. Whenever almost black eyes of a tall woman rested on her, she felt butterflies in her stomach. She trusted her. She felt that Joan was more than a friend to her but she wasn't sure if it was love. 

In fact, Vera has never been in love, she has never been in a proper relationship. This evening seemed to be a bad dream. Something completely unrealistic. She looked at window in Joan's flat last time and sighed.

 _Tomorrow will be better._ She thought before she started the engine and drove to home.

At that time, Joan was still sitting at the table trying collect the pieces. What's happened here? Why didn't she do anything? Her reaction was mechanical, she didn't even think about what she was doing. She told the truth when she said she cared about this little lamb. So, why, on hell, she moved away hand?  Staring at the empty space opposite her, she felt tears on her cheeks. She clumsily wiped them with the back of her hand. It didn't work, fresh tears started running down her cheeks faster and faster.  

It was strange, Joan didn't cry since... Jianna. But why now? Vera was important to her, but not as much as Jianna. She can told that young woman was - _is_ \- friend or at least someone she trust. Only Vera didn't look at her like she was freak. She felt more like human when young woman was with her, and she truly enjoyed her company. Now everything was over. She failed this timid mouse. She didn't protected her. 

Suddenly, in some anger, she threw a glass of wine on the floor. The glass shattered loudly. The dark liquid formed a stain similar to blood. The woman was scream almost like hurt animal when she started sobbing again. Her vision was blurred when she smashed the plates, scattering leftovers on the floor. She was losing control. Joan was looking for her father with a lost look. Even if the man treated her like something to need be corrected. Now she needed his help, advice.

 _Emotion leads to mistakes._ She repeating it in her head like a mantra, when she fell to the floor, hiding her face in her hands. She was alone. Everyone left her. Lost, didn't knowing how manage this emotions. So many things were boiling inside her. This was confusing, exhausting. Dark haired woman allowed some emotions to herself and now she wasn't even sure what she felt. She was almost like a child.

  
The whole situation was a nightmare, she wake up soon and will go to work, and everything will be like always. How was she supposed to fix it? After all, "I'm sorry" will not erase everything that happened. Will Vera ever forgive her? She suddenly felt tired. She sniffed loudly and went to the bedroom on shaky legs. 

"Everything will be fine, everything will be fine, everything will be fine." she muttered under her breath. Joan left mess in the kitchen, it was almost like mess in her head. She fell heavily on the bed and immediately drift off into a restless sleep.


End file.
